Be true to yourself to realise potential

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One trait that I find getting more common with each passing day is that people are not being themselves. They are constantly trying to become another personality — a transformation which is replete with behavioural and psychological issues.

One just has to visit a call centre and you will find Hari from Kanpur becoming Harry from Kansas City replete with the drawl. People visit the US for a few days and their attitude to life undergoes a sea change; not to mention their accents. Why do we undergo this transformation?
The cases I refer to above may be of youngsters. But the malaise is evident in the older age groups too. Among executives in MNCs, it is not uncommon to find the 40-plus age group trying hard to live up to an acquired lifestyle and taste to keep up with their foreign bosses. They will serve cheese and wine at get-togethers and try their best to learn the difference between Gorgonzola and Camembert cheeses, trying to remember which is French and which Italian. On the face of it, there is no harm in upscaling in knowledge and lifestyle, but the danger lies in forgetting who we are actually are.
I can give you an example from the world of performing arts. In the arts, one is influenced by one’s guru and adopts a similar style. But one cannot live a life believing that s/he is that guru. There is a distinction between emulation and in becoming someone else.
There is a philosophy to being yourself. For starters, it would be helpful to describe yourself in one word. Haughty, arrogant, conceited, humble, self-effacing, shy... which one of these adjectives fits you aptly? Why is it that you want to be someone else? What are your comfort zones? What complexes do you have and how did you acquire them? If you examine yourself through these questions, you will find the answers that you are seeking in being yourself.
In my book, I find that people who are not confident about themselves and suffer from low self-esteem are particularly prone to this attitude. But what we must understand is that such people are not the stereotyped depressives who are easy to spot. It is also the high flying executives who go business class and try to acquire a stiff upper lip and a glacial look — in the belief that such is the attitude of a business tycoon — who also suffer from the syndrome.
We have to realise that learning, and improving ourselves is a process of evolution but the process should enhance the individual in You and not make You someone else. Being yourself separates You from the world; it makes you stand out in a crowd. When you become someone else, you are part of the crowd.
You have to realise that if the weakness is You, the power is also You. You cannot get that power elsewhere as the only personality that you can depend upon freely is your own. It belongs to you.

The writer is a renowned film and theatre actor