Life is 90% monotony and 10% excitement

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How do you maintain consistency and stability at work for 30 yea-rs and over 400 films? I have be-en working for the past five years and have changed three jobs and I am already looking for a new one.
Rahul Shrivastav, Hyderabad

The problem is not necessarily with your jobs. It is with your attitude towards them. I always maintain that life is 90 per cent monotony and 10 per cent excitement. You seem to be looking for that 10 per cent in everything you do. Why don’t you enjoy what is already with you rather than imagining what could have happened to you? You could maybe, slow down your pace of thinking and avoid comparisons with other people. What you see and perceive about others may not be the truth or as you see it.

I am a 23-year-old girl and I have been in a relationship for a year now. I feel insecure about my relationship and it affects everything around me, my work and confidence. I am trying hard but it seems difficult. What advice do you have for people like me?
Priya Seth, Delhi

With every relationship that means something to you comes a bit of insecurity and other issues, because you try to overcome your fear of losing someone or something that you like. You don’t want to let it go. On the other hand, the idea of being in a relationship is to feel happy and peaceful. So, one should go into it trusting it. It is also important to make sure that the relationship has an element of equality. But if it makes you extremely unhappy, you should get out of it.

I am a mother of a 16-year-old girl. My daughter finds it boring to study and when she has to make an excuse, she refers to your interview where you said that failure is the best thing that ever happened to you. Are you glorifying failure?
Sheena Lalwani, New Jersey

Haha. No, I am not glorifying failure. However, I certainly believe that failure taken in the right spirit is a better teacher than success. In fact, I feel in today’s times parents instil the fear of failure in their children and cripple them emotionally for the rest of their lives. That is why in the recent past we hear about so many students committing suicide because they are scared of failure. I feel fear is imaginary, whereas failure is concrete so can be overcome. My grandfather used to say that we should not go through a problem twice: once by thinking about it and once by going through it. If you celebrate failure, it gives you a sense of success.

Readers can send their queries to askanupam@anupamkhercompany.com

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