Different strokes for different folks
The beauty of life is that we all feel that we are alike, yet we are so different from each other. While it may be a nice warm feeling to feel kinship with the rest of humankind, to feel that we are one, it is sometimes necessary to realise that we are all different in many ways. For example, the bane of many life-coaching programmes is to believe in the approach that one size fits all. Nothing can be further from the truth.
That is why you keep meeting people who have been trying out different programmes. Some benefit from one type and some others from another and yet others from a third. But in the process, many lose faith in being able to help themselves in such programmes as they feel they are unable to change.
What we should recognise is the fact that everyone on this planet is unique; we are all made differently. Indeed, there can never be another person like you among the 7 billion others on earth, and this is a proven genetic truth. Similarly, we all have our different problems, so one cure cannot treat us all. Medical science itself has now come to recognise that different medications act differently on different people. At a very basic level it has been established that even the optimal dosage of a formulation varies for men and women. So we need different strokes for different folks.
Many people will immediately realise this fundamental truth by comparing life-coaching programmes to dieting. There are so many dieting regimens around but as is very evident, not every diet programme works for everyone. Each person needs a different eating plan and even that plan may change as time goes by.
So how does one choose a plan that fits in with one’s needs? The answer lies largely in your own hands and you should begin by looking at yourself in the mirror, metaphorically speaking. Analyse what kind of a person you are in terms of your characteristics and what are your essential problem areas. And then compare the methods that different programmes offer. If you have an angry disposition with problems of anger management, you may perhaps require a course on how to release that pent up anger. Later, you need to also delve into what makes you angry and then learn how not to get affected by such triggers. A programme of meditation, of quietening your restless insides, will definitely help you.
But the same course will not be of much help to a person with a ‘shrinking violet’ type of personality. That person needs something else which will instil confidence in him and erase the constant fears of doubt that plague him on whether or not he will be able to rise up to the occasion. For him, the journey within, of quiet contemplation, will not help as much as exercises in a group that will enable him to come out of his ‘shell’.
So look at yourself, and decide what you are and what could suit your purpose, before you jump headlong into programmes that may not be cut out for you.
The writer is a renowned film and theatre actor
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