You’re fresh out of a disaster, and you are terrified at the thought of dating again, but you’re going to try anyway. Good for you! Here are some guidelines to help you avoid repeating old mistakes.
1. Pay attention!
You have things to learn here! The most important aspect of this date, in addition to having a good time, is to get to know each other better. No matter how excited, or thrilled you may be, listening to what your date says, watching what your date does and understanding how your date feels are still your primary objectives.
2. What your date thinks of you is not your business.
Your business is what you think of your date. One of the easiest ways to lose your objectivity and balance in this is to worry about what your date thinks about you. You’re supposed to be evaluating the other person, not pretending to look at yourself through his or her eyes. Pay attention so you know what you think of your date.
3. Look for integrity.
Make sure your date walks his or her talk. Anyone can talk big. Actually, some of the best people don’t present themselves well — don’t overlook someone who is not gorgeous, charming and glib.
4. Be careful about your
sexual safety.
Until the relationship progresses to the point that you become monogamous, and both have been tested for STDs, be careful. The nicest people can be infected with a disease and not even know they have it.
5. Know the signs of
emotional blackmail.
A demand: Your date won’t take “no”for an answer.
Pressure: Your date pressures you to go along.
Tactics: Threatening to end the relationship, tears, rage, badgering.
— MCT