Endings lead to new beginnings

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Healing from an emotionally draining experience is quite unlike healing from a physical illness. The course isn’t always predictable, it’s largely dependent on the individual and is influenced by a very vital aspect that influences healing — which is closure. Whether it is a failed relationship or the loss of a loved one or a plum assignment that you were forced to walk away from, not getting a chance to effect a proper closure and say goodbye makes it harder.
Perhaps it was a unilateral decision thrust on you or maybe you were busy taking care of all the nitty-gritty in caring for a loved one that saying goodbye was the farthest thing on your mind and scheme of things. Naturally, it rankles and takes you a long time to accept the reality and steer life back on normal course.
Time is the great healer no doubt but as Marianne Wilkinson said, “We don’t heal the past by living there. We heal the past by living fully in the present.”
As for those unspoken thoughts, words and feelings which need to find their way out — put down on paper whatever you would have said to your ex-lover, boss, spouse or whoever. Alternatively, vocalise in private the issues you wanted to iron out with a parent or loved one and resolve them.
Take the help of an expert healer who can promote healing by helping you achieve deep states of meditation in which you can visualise the healing conversations that you never had. It will put the relationship on a much better footing. If prose or poetry is not your cup of tea, draw or paint, sculpt or knit to give expression to your feelings. You can even tell it in the form of a story.
Recently, I read about a lady hurting so much from the loss of her cat that she didn’t want to talk about it. At a story telling workshop, she was encouraged to flesh out details of her cat, its numerous qualities and relive the times she spent with it. Not surprisingly, at the end of the session she felt a great catharsis.
Tuning into nature too can aid perspective and have a wonderfully harmonising effect.
As Dr Eric Pearl says in his book The Reconnection: Heal others, Heal Yourself, healing is the restoration of a person to spiritual wholeness and the release of blocks that separate one from the perfection of the universe and reconnection to the universe on a new level.
Believing that the universe knows what one needs to receive is a significant part of closure and a milestone in the path toward healing.

The writer is a Reiki channel, yoga practitioner and spiritual seeker. You can send her your queries at
selfdecoder@gmail.com [2]