Why prolonged courtship can be a risky affair

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Just as life changes with the changing times, perceptions about relationships also go through some modifications. Today, more and more couples are prolonging their courtship and are marrying much later on in life. From celebrities to the new age workaholics, marriage seems to be a formality they must fulfill for their family’s sake. However, does a prolonged courtship ensure a confirmed walk to the aisle?

Homemaker Sneha Ahuja, who was in a committed relationship for six years with her then boyfriend, but eventually married a boy of her parents’ choice says, “Courting for a long period comes with its advantages and disadvantages. One of the disadvantages is that it gives you the opportunity of knowing each other thoroughly well. When you have endured the other person’s irksome habits during the dating period, it gets slightly difficult to take the plunge. Also there is nothing you can tell each other anymore that is new. It all adds up to issues that ultimately lead to the end of the relationship, which is exactly what happened in my case.”
While for some the end result may not be this disheartening, they definitely miss the fun and excitement of getting married. Photographer Umesh Bajaj who has been with his girlfriend for the last five years and who became his live-in partner three years later, doesn’t support the idea of marriage but believes in the concept of love. He says, “My girlfriend wants us to get married, but she also says that she doesn’t feel excited enough to do so. Eventually we will marry as our families want us to but we are not very enthusiastic about the whole business.”
However, there are others who feel that one cannot get analytical about relationships because it’s a question of happiness and peace and there is no formula to follow, no primer to read, one just follows one’s heart and the time period hardly matters.
Event organiser Veta Sharma went around for 10 years before marrying the man of her “dreams”. She says, “We were never apprehensive that we wouldn’t end up together. We were sure of the choices we’d made. The only disadvantage I can think of is that you already know the person completely, so the initial charm of getting to know each other fades away a bit and you become each other’s habit. But in my case a longer courtship had more advantages than disadvantages.