‘Justice for my dead dad’

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My father, Syed Mohammad Yousuf died last month. They claim this happened when he was in police custody, but I refuse to believe that. It’s all been hushed up and there is no transparency about what may have transpired. Most of the reports say that Omar Abdullah had summoned my father and two other National Conference Party workers to his home for questioning, as other workers had apparently alleged that my father had promised them berths in the state ministry and legislative council and taken a bribe of more than a crore. After this, it is believed that my father was handed over to the crime branch, but somehow 12 hours later, my father was no more.
I just want the truth to be told. Nothing more, nothing less. It’s only the truth that I am in search of, and I want justice to prevail. My father was a devoted party worker of the NC. He had been with the Abdullah family for more than three decades. Initially it wasn’t as if he wanted to be associated with politics, but once he started working, he just went on and on till he became an active member of the party. As his family, we were always worried about the murky world of politics that he was getting involved in, but we never expected or even anticipated something like this coming.
I have always been slightly wary of the world of politics. I kept telling him to disassociate himself from that world, but to no avail.
My father never shared any work-related problems with us at home. We too never really interfered with his political work. All we told him was to be careful.
What irks me the most is the inability of the system, or rather the reluctance of the system, to let the truth out. Everybody has seen that my father looked completely healthy in the footage that was released and yet there were stories of cardiac arrest surrounding his death.
How can that be true? Does he look like he was suffering from any health problems? He never complained of any health problem except for a slight knee ache. His death turned mysterious because when we asked questions, they were not answered and everything was simply brushed under the carpet.
We just want to know what exactly happened and why was everything done so discreetly like there was a big cover-up? If the process had been kept transparent, the Jammu and Kashmir government would have done something to bring us relief and help us cope with our loss. But it clearly isn’t a priority since nothing has changed since the day he died.
Since Day One of what seems to be a long wait for us, all I have demanded is clarity — clarity in the probe and clarity in the explanation that was given by the government. It is difficult to believe that he could have died of a cardiac arrest. People have been saying that our chief minister, Omar Abdullah, has suddenly turned and said that my father was not a close aide. Tell me, why would you fly with someone in your family chopper and show up at their family functions if you are not close? If he was just an ordinary party worker, how did he manage to be in such close proximity of the entire Abdullah family? I am not accusing or blaming anyone, merely stating some observations. I just don’t know how this is not enough for them to accept my father as a close aide. I am neither blaming the CM nor am I accusing him of anything. But the least that he can do for us is initiate a probe and not just let it fizzle out like nothing happened.
When all this happened to us, people kept asking us if we feel scared or threatened, but neither has crossed my mind. All that I feel is a deep void within me, a place that my father occupied. Sometimes, I feel so numb that nothing affects me. Now, I am at the point where nothing interests me more than the thought that my father deserves justice.
A son has lost his father, and wants to see his dead father’s soul at peace. Fear doesn’t exist in my dictionary any more. I don’t even fear for our lives anymore.
What has disappointed me, however, is the way everyone distanced themselves from us. No one from the party came home to condole or even called to offer support. What upsets me most is that not even a customary FIR has been lodged till date and no explanations have been forthcoming on why they are trying to hush up the matter if there is nothing to hide in the first place.
We have been endlessly waiting all this while for something to happen, but not even a ray of hope was given to us in these trying times. We finally went to a local court seeking a CBI probe. I have no intention at all of giving up this fight for justice and will continue to fight the case till my last breath if need be.
There really is no need to seek strength from somewhere else. It just comes from within when the angst and grief bubbles over. That itself is enough to drive you in your search for a little dignity in your father’s death. I will go on till I get justice.