March 20 : One often wonders why most Indians who live abroad end up spending all their time with fellow desis? Is it because we are secretly racist — or do we lack the self-confidence to mingle with non-Indians? Recently two new films — one Brit-Asian, Life Goes On and the other based
in the US, Bollywood Beats reflected this quite successfully — and the “phorener”, usually a “gora” or “gori” (very rarely is it a black character), does not enjoy more than a small part in either film. Even though both films are set outside India — should this really surprise us? So are Asian filmmakers abroad writing stories which will appeal to the Indian psyche or is this a reality check of how ordinary Indians actually live? Safe, within a comfort zone, clinging to each other? Then the question is: why leave India at all? Is it only for the economic benefits?
Most of the major roles (in both films) are played by desis, and apart from the location (and the fact that both films had “gay” couples in it) the films could have just as easily been about successful Indians living in a metro in India. Both films were very well made — so I am not critiquing the films: I am simply stating that they accidentally brought to the fore the main problem of being an Indian abroad: very few of us want to delve into unfamiliar territory.
In mainstream big budget Hindi cinema (a la Karan Johar) I always thought because huge monies was spent it meant the audience would see their favourite stars — and so a foreign chehra was taboo. Thus even in My Name Is Khan , when Shah Rukh Khan falls in love, it has to be with Kajol. The other problem being that most foreign actors manage to mangle Hindi when they speak it and so it often propels the director to enforce silence upon them as in Love Aaj Kal.
However, perhaps the reality is that we are “like that only”. We do prefer the company of another desi than to befriend someone culturally unknown to us. It is something Indians who live abroad must attempt to rectify. We will miss out on so much if we do not mingle with other cultures.
Nonetheless, I have to say that these last few weeks, almost every event I have attended has had an Asian flavour. So either I am also falling into the trap of logging onto my comfort zone — or it may be that we have really colonised the UK.
And then perhaps, I cannot really be blamed because the charming and sophisticated Sharmila Tagore and her daughter Soha Ali Khan were here — and it was wonderful to be able to have a quiet lunch with them at the House of Lords. It caused a real flutter among some of the Asian attendants in the dining room — because those famous dimples still have the power to knock you over into your soup. Soha is also emerging into a talented actress, and now that she is seriously looking at roles outside of India, it is easy to imagine her as an international star. She may have her mother’s petite frame — but she is an intelligent graduate from the London School of Economics (LSE), and her determination and interest in good roles will take her a long way.
Earlier in the week Sharmila and Soha honoured Saeed Jaffrey at the Nehru Centre, giving him a Lifetime Achievement Award from Pravasi Today. Saeed Jaffrey was entertaining as always at the event, recounting how he had asked Satyajit Ray for a role and was fortunate enough to be given one in the brilliant Shatranj Ke Khilari. It was a rare opportunity to watch the thespian in action, but despite his bravura performance, he seemed frail.
And not just the filmi events, even the literary functions this week had an Asian resonance. The highlight was a reading by Vikram Seth on friendship and poetry at the LSE. It was a fascinating evening — because Vikram quoted from a range of poets on their interpretation of friendship. There were even three Chinese poets — translated by Vikram — and he discussed the different kinds of poems written in praise of friendship, as well as the situations in which they had been written. The evening was part of the Eva Colorni lecture series. Eva was Amartya Sen’s wife — and so Amartya was chairing the evening. Of course, the theatre was overflowing with poetry enthusiasts — and Vikram covered a wide range — ending with a reading from his Beastly Tales about the fable of the crocodile and the monkey. Now that is a dangerous tale of treacherous “friends” which carries a severe health warning, i.e., beware of those friends who profess to love you — but are ready to kill you if they want anything you have.
Meanwhile, one person who could do with some friends is the much-maligned Pamela Bordes. I had met her in Goa a few years ago, at a book shop and I vaguely remembered her. In fact, I had quite forgotten her fracas here with the press and her once-upon-a-time very risqué image. However, whilst I had taken her for face value as a photographer starting life all over again in Goa — in the UK there are many who have still not forgotten her.
Therefore, every now and then there is “scandalous” report of her enjoying life in Goa — and then it rakes up her past, including her affair with the editor Andrew Neil. (Who can forget her gesture of cutting up all his expensive suits before she quit his home?) and working as an escort girl for Adnan Kashoggi. One of the more aggressive tabloids even seems to have sent special reporters and photographers to Goa to track down the poor Ms Bordes and ask her all kinds of embarrassing questions. Rather aggressively the paper states “She was the escort girl whose affairs with Establishment figures scandalised Britain. Today Pamella (sic) Bordes lives in a tiny flat in a seedy Indian resort, ostracised by her family and reduced to chatting up men on the Internet”.
In my sole encounter with Pamela I remember a quiet, but very attractive woman interested in talking about her photographs. None of us mentioned her “tempestuous” past — and it is entirely possible that Pamela wants to start afresh. It is at times like this that I find the British press, especially the tabloids, quite intrusive.
But ultimately, the desis are everywhere — even in the scandals reported in the tabloids. You simply cannot avoid the desis! What’s going on?
By Kishwar Desai
The writer can be contacted at
kishwardesai@yahoo.com
