One of the common mistakes we make in our spiritual search is to assume that inner peace and serenity is something outside of us. That it exists in some other time and zone, that conditions have to be perfect (all problems must be out of

the way) and that it is only certain people who have it all who seem to attract the happiness that comes with peace and serenity, while it remains an elusive dream for the rest of us. Nothing could be farther from the truth.
Which is why I was overjoyed when I stumbled upon an anonymous quote that said it all. “Serenity is not freedom from the storm, but peace amid the storm.” But what actually happens when we are in the eye of a storm — figuratively speaking? We rave and rant, explode in anger (“trust my luck, it’s always me”), kick up a fuss, wallow in self-pity or sink into a depression — a term that we use quite loosely to mean that we are really upset.
Have you ever thought about what happens to your brain when you are either very angry or very sad? Are you at all able to think through the problem with a clear head and find solutions? Or is your judgment so clouded that an answer seems a distant possibility till you calm down?
Serenity at all times, especially under the most trying situations, can make a world of difference to the way you handle things. Of course, you are human and of course you will feel whatever you are bound to feel but if you quickly find your centre, do whatever it is that needs to be done and remain anchored, the outcome will be that much more positive.
So retreating into that inner core where all is still and calm is what we should be doing more often, not going and looking for peace someplace else. Have you noticed the way water in a lake flows? There may be ripples on the surface and they are just that — mere ripples — but deep down it is all very still.
Nature incidentally is one of the best teachers and comforters. As Dr Wayne Dyer puts it, “Give yourself the gift of nature as often as you can. Immerse yourself in the peace that surrounds you and notice how you are almost swept up into the arms
of God.”
The very antithesis of serenity is worry, fear, anxiety, self blame and other such emotions. Eckhart Tolle, author of seminal works like The Power of Now and Stillness Speaks says, “Suffering begins when you mentally label a situation as bad. That causes an emotional contraction. When you let it be without naming it, enormous power is available to
you. The contraction cuts you off
from that power, the power of life itself. With stillness comes the benediction of peace.”
Fear is one of the most mentally draining of emotions that has us in its vice-like grip when life deals us a blow. Christopher Hansard who studied the Tibetan art of serenity in depth says, “For most of us fear becomes a habit very early in life. Yet each one of us is capable of living without fear. And a life without fear is a life transformed, for if we let go of fear serenity takes its place. With serenity our inner chaos becomes still, we find inner balance and we have the key to inner and outer transformation. We are able to think more clearly, make decisions more
easily and experience love and contentment more fully. Life becomes a blessing.”
Hansard studied the Bon traditions that were followed in Tibet long before Buddhism took root and serenity is very central to them. If getting to “stillness” when you are greatly troubled is your hurdle, try and follow a few of these techniques to tide over the difficulty. Go for a long walk, run, work out (expend that energy usefully), swim, play some soothing music… Some people need a little physical activity, others need something
more gentle like music or chants or a change of scene. Figure out what works for you.
Finally let me leave you with the serenity prayer by Reinhold Niebuhr:
God grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change;
Courage to change the things I can;
And wisdom to know the
difference.